Really big ruler

Most rulers are really small, like Napoleon for example, but not this one. Seriously, the others just don't measure up. This is definitely one ruler to rule them all.

Type: weapon (melee)
Class: blade
Hands: 1
Attack: 22
Cost of TP on use: N/A
Damage Type: Physical damage
Autosell value: 95

Cannot be discarded
Can be autosold
Can be stored
Can be traded

Outfit name: N/A

Plural: sets of really big rulers
Bonus: N/A

Obtained From

Trigonopolymonomathopathology Lab (parent)
- trigonometric malfunction

Combat Messages

Successful Attack

With a slap and a thwack you leave your opponent thoroughly smacked for X damage.
You measure your opponents with your ruler, then deliver a well-calculated, custom-made hit for X damage.
The sound of your ruler reminds your opponents of that time back in school when they were naughty. Your opponent is scared for X damage.
You give your opponents a taste of your blade! Errrr�[sic]. ruler. X damage.

Miss Message(s)

The sound of your ruler swishing through the air distracts you too much to actually hit.

You try to administer a gentlemanly whack with your ruler, but unfortunately you have no idea how to do that.

Fumble Message

You try to hit your opponent with your ruler, but it rebounds and slaps you right in the <Body parts> for X damage.

Notes

Defeat 300 opponents with this weapon to get the Compensation award.

References

Napoleon was a 'ruler' of France. He was very short.
"...one ruler to rule them all" is a reference to a poem from Lord of the Rings:

"Three Rings for the Elven-kings under the sky,
Seven for the Dwarf-lords in their halls of stone,
Nine for Mortal Men doomed to die,
One for the Dark Lord on his dark throne
In the Land of Mordor where the Shadows lie.
One Ring to rule them all, One Ring to find them,
One Ring to bring them all and in the darkness bind them
In the Land of Mordor where the Shadows lie."

Collection

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