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If you click the Image of the poster in cinema 7, you would get this Disclaimer to open:
If you click the Image of the poster in cinema 7, you would get this Disclaimer to open:
<center>[[Image:HorrorVisionDisclaimer.jpg]]</center>
<center>[[Image:HorrorVisionDisclaimer.jpg]]</center>
== New Movies ==
<b>Gorgonzola vs. Neopluridon</b>
What happens when jet-powered turtles, gigantic butterflies and giant, flame-breathing iguanas descend on a major city in the eastern isles? Running. Lots of running. And screaming by the bucketful. Toppling buildings, falling bridges and power lines flashing with blue electricity make cameo appearances throughout this masterpiece. You keep asking yourself one question, though. Why do these nations always bring in some Paracitical general to command their military when the day is always saved by a couple of miniature pop stars singing the monster's name?
Actually, this would be a fairly entertaining flick were it not for the fact that the projectionist must be both blind and deaf. Not only has the movie been blurry since just after the opening credits, but there has been no productive response to the repeated shouts from the audience to, "Focus!" It strikes you that perhaps the projectionist is doing nothing because there is nothing to do. Perhaps the monsters themselves are blurry.
Can you imagine having out-of-focus monsters running around the countryside? Shudder.
<b>Monster Battle Royale</b>
Ah, nostalgia. There's nothing quite like a vintage black and white homage to the classic movie monsters of years gone by. Unfortunately, many of these would-be tributes tend to go overboard and bring together as many monsters as humanly imaginable. Even more unfortunately, this seems to be one of those. You stare numbly at the screen as backwater villagers face an onslaught of every conceivable B Movie monster. Ultimately, after all of the townspeople have been slaughtered, the monsters turn to plan nine and turn on each other.
Wolfman takes a bite out of Dracula when Frankenstein comes back covered in a tire track, but the Mummy jumps out and lands on his back. The Blob gets injured and tries to get steady, when the Invisible Man hacks it apart with a machete. All the while, some creepy old guy stands idly by, face hidden behind his cape. The fight rages on for the last half of the movie and many in the theater fall asleep, but eventually the champion stands; the rest see their better. Mister Hyde in a bloodstained sweater.
As you go to stand up, your hand slips down the side of the seat and you extract something... vaguely cool Wow! You wonder what poor shmuck managed to lose a pair of these high-tech-looking X-D glasses, but who cares? They're stylish as hell and, who knows, they might come in handy.
== Notes ==
== Notes ==