Cinema Seven - The Horrovision Experience!
Without X-D specs equipped:
After standing in line for about 1 hour short of eternity, you get to the ticket window only to be told that the new X-D show has just sold out.
Distraught, you leave the line of eager, smiling faces. Suckers.
As you are about to leave, a seedy-looking usher sidles up to you and whispers, "I can see how disappointed you are. Trust me, this new movie experience can not be missed! Tell you what. If you can come up with your own pair of glasses, I can get you into the cinema. For a nominal fee of course."
With X-D specs equipped: After standing in line for about 1 hour short of eternity, you get to the ticket window only to be told that the new X-D show has just sold out.
Distraught, you leave the line of eager, smiling faces. Suckers.
As you are about to leave, a seedy-looking usher sidles up to you and whispers, "I can see how disappointed you are. Trust me, this new movie experience can not be missed! Hey, You have your own pair of glasses!"
The usher leads you to a corner and continues whispering, "Tell you what. I can sneak you into Cinema Seven if you promise not to tell anyone I helped you. And if you give me 150 moolah."
Scene 1 begins
Choosing this will make you leave the cinema 7.
Scene 1
You grab the only available seat, which happens to be between a large smelly guy and a woman dressed up like a techno-pirate. After gawking for a few moments, you finally notice that the lights have dimmed and the show is starting.
You look at the screen for a second, and suddenly find yourself standing in a barn with a scantily-clad member of the opposite sex. As your eyes meet, something clicks. No, not like that...something literally clicks, and the sound is coming from the dark, spooky loft.
Wow, these X-D glasses are AMAZING. But now, you have a decision to make...
Scene 2
If you picked Get the Military Involved
If you picked Make a Special Connection with That
Amidst all the carnage, you feel your oats like never before and choose to act on them. Too bad you forgot the first rule of horror movies, noob. Then again, I don't know that I'd really call this a horror movie. It seems more like a suspenseful thriller, don't you think? And as we all know, people can get busy all they want to in suspenseful thrillers and still manage to survive, so get 'er done.
The scene shifts.
The wind is howling outside. The shutters on your windows bang loudly. Did you leave those open? As you walk over to close them, you hear a creaking you must be hungry noise coming from upstairs. Suddenly, the lights flicker off and back on. Then your cell phone rings.
You pick it up, with your heart in your throat.
If you picked Head For The Car
Scene 3
If you picked Drop The Phone In A Handy Vat Of Sulfuric Acid
If you picked Answer The Phone
Despite the fact that you're certain that the person on the other end of the line is going to ask you what your favorite scary movie is or tell you that you have a week to live, you answer the phone anyway.
Surprisingly enough, it's actually a telemarketer calling to inform you that you've just won a cruise to some obscure island off the coast of a war-torn country, but in order to collect the "prize", you have to subscribe to 30 different magazines that you've never even heard of.
This pisses you off so much that you march down to the local calling center to give them a piece of your mind.
While you're gone, the killer that WAS in your house accidentally blows the whole place to pieces... while he's still inside. It sucks that your house is now a burning pile of rubble but hey, at least you're alive, right?
The scene shifts.
You relax in your favorite armchair, listening to the local radio station when a news bulletin interrupts your favorite show. According to the report, a maniac serial killer, armed with a semi-automatic weapon, has escaped from the nearby asylum. As the reporter details the gruesome slayings occurring in the vicinity, the ever-increasing volume of the eerie music being broadcast behind the report begins to creep you out.
You change the station only to discover that the music is still playing, and it's not coming from the radio! Holy crap!
If you picked Head For The Car
Scene 4
If you picked Ignore The Intense Music
If you picked Heed The Intense Music
You've got the be the first person to ever actually (or is it "actually ever"? Meh.) notice that an impressive crescendo of ominous music might mean that something bad is about to happen.
Unfortunately, your response isn't quite so impressive.
You run down the stairs, and trip over your own feet, which sends you rolling down the stairs. However, by the time you reach the bottom, you've built up enough momentum to break down the front door and roll out into the front yard.
You get up and run to the police station. Despite the fact that the station is like, 10 miles away, you still get there within 30 seconds.
The scene shifts.
The frat party is pretty much over by now. You and your broheim are mellaxing amidst the debris of "Chi Omega's Totally Tubular Toga Par-T", when you both hear a strange sound from somewhere nearby in the house.
Your friend starts to freak the eff out. Totally.
If you picked Head For The Car