Gang banger

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Description

"Yo! Yo Marthall! Hey, Marthall, wait up!" A scrawny figure comes running up to you, "Yo Marthall, Britney athked me to tell you to get thome diaperth from the thtore on..." he pauses for a second to look you over carefully. "Wait, you ain't Marthall!" The kid's astute.

"Naw dawg," he continues, his wispy little mustache quivering, "You ain't Marthall at all. You jutht thome no good, ugly, lame-ath [insert appropriate ghetto insult]*. Marthall's not gon' be happy to thee you roun' here. You betht beat it 'fo' you get it beat fo' you!"

• See your favourite search engine for an appropriate epithet. On second thoughts, maybe don't.

Opponent Level Information

Opponent Level:

Power Level:

Attack Rating:

Defence Rating:

Scaling

• Does this opponent scale to you? No
• Subpoints Gain: Does this scale with player stats? No
• Opponent Level: Does this scale with player stats? No
• HP: Does this scale with player stats? No
• Elemental Damage Reduction: Y/N? If So What Kind
• Elemental Weakness: Y/N? If So What Kind
• Physical Resistance: Y/N?

Combat Messages

Jump Message:

• The fire's definitely in his eyes, but his words aren't all that clear and even though you can't really understand him, you're sure he's probably wrong. Also, he's only small and weak-looking. You decide to take him on.

Successful Attack:

• Your opponent bunches his puny fist and takes a wild swing at you. You notice the glint of a shiny knuckle-duster a split-second before it connects with your Body parts for X DAMAGE
• You decide to just leave, and try to tell him so... "Look, I'm just gonna go n.." but he interrupts, "D'joo say my momma'th a ho?", and frantically attacks you with everything he has for X DAMAGE

Missed Attack:

• He charges at you, but stumbles over his ridiculously low-slung jeans and winds up just looking like a fool with his pants, and himself, on the ground.
• Your opponent begins to attack and then, for absolutely no apparent reason, starts singing a song about some random girl he appears to have met. It's a nice song, sure, but what? Nice work, Mr. Bernstein, err... Shakespeare. Whatever.
• He whips out a can of spray paint and points it at your face, then presses the button, spraying a huge cloud of paint into the air. Unfortunately for him, the wind blows it straight back at him, completely blocking his vision.
• Your opponent suddenly remembers the critical diaper situation at home and since you're not the real Thlim Thady, he dashes off to continue his search

Location(s)

• Downtown

Rewards

• You acquire an item: Can of spray-paint (18.5%)
• You acquire an item: low-slung jeans(19%)
• You acquire an item: don't rag (13%)
• You acquire an item: knuckle-duster (16%)
• You acquire an item: lucky grilles (12%)

Stats:

• You gain ?1-5? Brains subpoints
• You gain ?1-5? Brawn subpoints
• You gain ?2-7? Bravado subpoints

References

• Reference to Marshall Mathers aka Eminem.
• You're not the real Thilm Thady is a reference to Eminem's song The Real Slim Shady.
• Jump is a reference to the song "Beat It" by Michael Jackson.
• Missed attack "Pants on the Ground" is a reference to the song of the same name.