Newspaper

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"The Local Whinge" is Paradox City's most popular tabloid rag. Full of all the wonderful new things that people have found recently in and around the city, and all the not-so-wonderful whining about the stuff they don't like.

Type: weapon (melee)
Class: club
Hands: 1
Attack: 7
Cost of TP on use: N/A
Damage Type: Physical damage
Autosell value: 25

Cannot be discarded
Can be autosold
Can be stored
Can be traded

Outfit name: N/A

Plural: newspapers
Bonus: N/A

Obtained From

• Junkyard
  • Garbage-gathering rodent

When Used In Combat

Successful Attack(s):

• You roll up the newspaper and bop your opponent on the nose for XX damage. Bad dog! If your opponent doesn't have a nose, or isn't a dog, or you just don't like its colour, please feel free to write a letter. There's a page for people like you.
• You slap your opponent around the face, or face-analog, for XX damage.
• You read out the jokes page to your opponent who takes XX damage from laughing so hard.

Failed Attack(s):

• You open the newspaper to the obituaries, and see your own name. The shock causes you X damage!
• You consider trying to swat your opponent as if him was a fly, but you decide that's cruel so you don't.
• You decide to read the comic strips and completely forget that you are supposed to be attacking your opponent. Huhhuhhuh, that Calvin...

Collection

jupider - 1337 | LordCretin - 500 | McFeisty - 317 | Eboli2x4 - 255 | CommanderMack - 104 | FrostyTheCrAcKHead - 88 | Gurps - 44 | Arikel - 40 | underscore - 24 | Rapthorne - 15