Barroom Blitz

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Description

A Paracite (that would be you) walks into a bar, and the bartender says, "Aren't you a piece of string?"

Yeah, you know where this is going.

Having heard more than your fair share of punch lines lately, you quickly line up a punch of your own, smack the bartender in the face, grab what you can, and leg it. Sweet.

Location(s)

• Downtown

Rewards

• You gain 1 Tiny bottle of vodka XX%
• You gain 1 Tiny bottle of tequila XX%
• You gain 1 tiny bottle of rum XX%
• You gain 1 tiny bottle of gin XX%
• You gain ?1-3? tiny bottle of bourbon XX%
• You gain 1 tiny bottle of scotch XX%

Notes

The punchline can be one of:

• Aren't you a piece of string?
• Hey, do you know you've got a carrot in your ear?
• Why the long face?
• These two peanuts came in yesterday.
• We don't get many gorillas around here.
• Hey, we've got a drink named after you!
• Are you Vincent Van Gogh?
• Hey buddy, you've got a steering wheel down your pants!
• So there was this polar.... bear in here last week.
• Boy, I wish I could do that.
• Big John's coming to town!
• How did you get that peg leg?

References

• Name of location is a play on the song title "Ballroom Blitz" by Sweet. (who is mentioned in the last world of dialogue)